Many misspelled words (i.e.you used “of” instead of “off” twice, “…sitting in my bead(sic)”, “gourgeous” instead of “gorgeous”, “waste(sic) band” instead of “waist band”, etc. Anal sex Needs more detail. (i.e. The idea of this story is good, but the execution of it falls way too short of hitting the mark of being a great story.«1» The idea of this story is good, but the execution of it falls way too short of hitting the mark of being a great story.«1» The idea of this story is good, but the execution of it falls way too short of hitting the mark of being a great story.«1» “walking up the the living room.” , “…gave my(sic) a boobjob”, “…what were were doing…”
This is pretty pitiful writing even if you are only 14.anonymous readerReport 2013-11-30
